Therapy · Online in California
Therapy for Midlife Women
Therapy for women in perimenopause who are ready to set boundaries, speak up, find peace.
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You've given a lot of yourself away. Something in you is waking up.
I had a client tell me recently that she'd started saying no to things and didn't feel guilty about it, and then she paused and said, "Is that bad?" It's not bad. It's data.
Your willingness to keep tolerating things is not infinite, and somewhere in your forties, a lot of women find out exactly where the bottom of that well is.
Here's what I notice, working with women in this exact chapter: the friendship that's been one-sided for years finally gets named as one-sided. The conversation you keep having with your husband, the one that never actually resolves, stops feeling like something you can just let go of one more time. The job you outgrew a while back but never said anything about starts to feel unbearable instead of just annoying.
This is information your system has been collecting for a long time, and it's finally loud enough to hear.
I want to name something else, too: you might be caring a lot less about things that used to take up enormous amounts of your energy.
Whether people are a little annoyed with you. Whether you phrased something exactly the "nice" way.
That's energy coming back online that used to go toward managing everyone else's experience of you.
What you do with it now is the interesting part.
The tricky bit, and I say this to almost every client I work with, is that knowing you're done tolerating something and knowing how to actually say so are two completely different skills.
You can be crystal clear internally and still go quiet the second it's time to say the actual sentence out loud. We build that skill, together, with real practice.
And underneath all of it, there's usually a bigger question waiting. Not "how do I set better boundaries," but "what do I actually want the next twenty years to look like, now that I'm not spending all of myself keeping everyone else comfortable."
That's the real work. The boundaries are just how you clear enough room to hear your own answer.
If you're in that stretch right now, done tolerating and still figuring out what's next, I'd love to talk with you.
“I came in thinking I just needed help processing my last ceremony. What I didn’t expect was to actually meet the anxious part of me that had been running the show for thirty years.”
Where the journey meets the ground.
Find Your Voice
You've known what you needed to say for a long time. You just didn't say it. Maybe it felt less risky to stay quiet. Maybe no one ever showed you how.
Speaking up is a skill, not a personality trait. We build it here: what to say, how to say it, and the practice it takes to say it.
The Approach
Internal Family Systems
Every part of you developed for a reason, often to protect you from something that once felt unsafe to feel or say. Some learned agreement was safer than honesty.
IFS is built on the idea that you have several parts, not just one. We name what each is protecting you from, and build trust with the steadier part underneath.
Somatic Therapy
Long before you have words for what's true, your body already knows it. A tightening in the chest. A held breath. When we pause here, something in you starts to speak.
As a certified somatic therapist, I help you slow down enough to actually feel what's present. A boundary often arrives first as a sensation.
Meet Ali
I'm a licensed therapist with over 20 years of experience, mindfulnss teacher, and the author of two books.
I trained in IFS at the IFS Institute and bring 30+ years of yoga and spiritual practice into the room with me. At 50+ and in menopause myself, I'm doing this work in my own life right alongside my clients.
I work with women in their forties and fifties who are self-aware, motivated, and done tolerating what they've been tolerating for years, in a friendship, a marriage, a job, a version of themselves that stopped fitting a while ago.
I lead with warmth, and I pair it with honesty.
Together, we get clear on what you actually want to say, build the boundaries to protect your well-being, and create a life filled with peace.
Get to know me
How We’ll Work Together
A 15-minute call to see if this is the right fit, and to talk about what came up for you.
Ongoing IFS and somatic work, online, so the boundary you're ready to set has somewhere real to practice.
Stay connected to the part of you that holds steady, even when stress hits and old roles are trying to take over.
